the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
