I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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