So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
