He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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