so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
