the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
