My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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