So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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