how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
