Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
