I wannas sexs uuuuu
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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