all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
