I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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