i permit you to call me
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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