Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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