btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
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Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
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I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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