Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
