Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
