Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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