Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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