That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Farmville is her only friend.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
