on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
