I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
