I got chris browned last night
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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