The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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