Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby