1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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