It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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