I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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