The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
