Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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