I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
