if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
