I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
My breasts were aching with rage.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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