No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
