I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
