i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
