The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
