yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
