I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
