this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Randomize
