so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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