That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
