Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize