she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
