how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize