is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
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Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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