just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize