I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize