The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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