My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
