new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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