yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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